As parents, we all want our kids to be happy. We strive to create an environment that fosters their happiness and well-being. Yet we may be doing our kids a disservice, especially if we just remove any obstacle in their path to happiness. We inadvertently leave them with no skills to deal with life, but we want resilience in kids.
We may want to protect our kids from disappointment, failure, and adversity, yet it is impossible to shield them from the challenges of life. Resilience, which is the ability to cope with adversity and bounce back from setbacks, is the number one life skill that will ensure your child is better equipped to deal with life.
Life is unpredictable, and our kids will inevitably face obstacles and challenges that can be painful and difficult to navigate. Rather than shielding our kids from these challenges, we should equip them with the tools they need to face them head-on. Resilience is one such tool. Resilience helps kids develop a sense of self-efficacy, or the belief that they can overcome obstacles and achieve their goals.
1. Encourage a Growth Mindset
Kids who have a growth mindset believe that their abilities and talents can be developed through hard work and persistence. This mindset helps kids embrace challenges as opportunities for growth, rather than sources of failure or disappointment. Encourage your kids to take on challenges and emphasise the importance of effort and persistence, rather than innate ability. This is something that is encouraged in all our classes but especially our Extension Classes.
2. Help Kids Develop Coping Skills
Coping skills are the strategies and techniques that kids can use to manage stress, anxiety, and other negative emotions. Coping skills might include deep breathing, mindfulness, positive self-talk, or seeking social support. Encourage your kids to try different coping strategies and help them develop a toolkit of techniques that work for them. Whatever you do, do not encourage giving up quickly or running away. This only increases anxiety and very quickly can spill into other areas of their life.
3. Model Resilience
This is a tough one, but kids learn resilience by watching the adults around them. Model resilience in your own life by facing challenges with a positive attitude, persistence, and problem-solving skills. Talk openly with your kids about how you cope with stress and adversity, and emphasise the importance of resilience as a life skill.
Of course, as a parent, we want our kids to be happy, but equally important is the realisation that we should not try to make them happy every day of their life, as we may be doing more harm than good. It is important to recognize that happiness is not always achievable or sustainable. By teaching our kids resilience, we equip them with the tools they need to navigate life's challenges and emerge stronger and more confident. Encourage a growth mindset, help kids develop coping skills, and model resilience in your own life. By doing so, you can help your kids develop the resilience they need to thrive in life.
